THE TRUTH ABOUT WANT
"The subtle difference
between want and desire is everything when it comes to living your
-- Kristen Howe
"What do you want?" can be a daunting question. We all
ask it, of
ourselves and others. I noticed so much resistance to it, that I tried
something a little different with a few of my coaching clients.
Here's what I did - I sent out an email to a bunch of my clients and in
email I asked them 2 questions. The first question was "What do you
want?" and the second question was "What do you desire?" Now,
here is the crazy and cool thing that happened...
The answers to "What do you want" were all based in 1 of 2 things: 1.
In other words, quite a few people said they don't know what they want
of the other answers had a feeling of lack to them - like, "I want to
out of debt." Or "I want to lose 20 pounds." Or "I want to
fix my marriage." - You get the idea...
On the other hand, the answer to "What do you desire" had a
completely different energy to them. The best way to describe the
that these answers were based in positivity. Answers like, "I desire
growth in my business that it is fulfilling, profitable and helps
thousands of people." Or, "I desire to have ultimate health." Or
"I desire love to fill and fuel all of my relationships."
So, what's the point to all of this?
The point is that the word 'Want' seems to be rooted in negativity, low
confidence, and lack. While the word 'Desire' seems to be rooted in
love and faith.
I know it is just a difference of one word, but if that one word is
of the difference, don't you want to make an adjustment? Remember,
always win, so if you emotionally connect a feeling of lack to the word
- then it's time for an adjustment. And, once you make this adjustment,
'Want' and 'Desire' can become positively charged words for you that
You can make this adjustment and begin to shift with 3 steps -
STEP 1: Discover what you
want - as I just said, emotions always win, so what is it you REALLY
best way to get to the bottom of this question is to realize that you
identify the EMOTION you want instead of the THINGS.
For example: Let's say you have always wanted to own your own home.
What is the
emotion(s) you believe will come with owning your own home?
Let's say that you realize that the emotions that you feel will
owning your own home are, a sense of security, confidence and a feeling
Then - a sense of security, confidence and a feeling of success are
The great news about identifying the emotions you want is that you open
yourself up to infinite possibilities to feel those emotions (instead
the one possibility of owning your own home.) AND, once you do this,
the negative, lack filled, connection to the word 'Want'.
Trust me, when you do just this one step, the chances of you finally
THING you have wanted for so long, increases substantially.
STEP 2: Find out WHY - ask
WHY these emotions are what you really want? Is your answer based in
doubt, lack or any negativity of any kind? If so, no worries, you can
the positively charged emotion by just flipping it around.
For example: Let's continue to use the earlier example of owning your
- where you identified that the true emotions you want are a sense of
confidence and a feeling of success. Now, when it comes time to ask WHY
emotions are what you want, if your answer is positive, GREAT (go ahead
move onto step 3) but if it is negative, such as, "I want to feel a
of security so I don't have to rely on anyone else anymore." Then you
to flip it around like so "I want to feel a sense of security and know
that all of my needs are easily met."
Pay attention and make sure you feel completely positive with all of
reasons WHY before you move on to step 3.
Living in the NOW gives you access to infinite creation
and is the key to attracting
what you DESIRE -
find out the simple 3 steps here...
STEP 3: Transform the Want to
Desire! As I said, often 'Want' is negative and fueled by a feeling of
- while 'Desire' is positive and full of possibility. This step may
seem like a
simple rephrasing, but believe me, it works! I want you to take what
discovered from BOTH step 1 and step 2 and swap out the word 'Want'
For example: 'I WANT a sense of security, confidence and a feeling of
becomes 'I DESIRE a sense of security, confidence and a feeling of
And - 'I WANT to feel a sense of security and know that all of my needs
easily met.' Becomes 'I DESIRE to feel a sense of security and know
that all of
my needs are easily met.'
Use these 3 simple steps to transform your 'Wants' into 'Desires' and
be amazed at the changes that start to happen in your life!